KBI

KBI - Kilabot ng Bilyaran/Bideoke/Blog/Baraha at Inuman

4 months ku yan pinagisipan.

hehehehhehe

KBI - Kaibigang Bad Influence

nyahahaha

Buy 1 Take 2

My boyfriend and I have been goin steady for 2yrs now. The longest relationship I've been in considering that this was my first. LOL. During our first 7months together, everything was smooth sailin. Then on our 10th or 11th month, things just started to get boring. Maybe it was because we had too much of each other already. What at first was sweet was not as remotely close to being sweet anymore after a year. There were times that I even get irritated just by the mere sight of him. We also started fighting about petty things. Things were just goin from bad to worse. I wanna break up with him! But everytime I want do so, my guilt takes over me. He's a real gentleman, maybe that's why I'm bored with him. This went on and on and on..until now we've reached our 2nd yr anniversary. I've mastered the art of pretending. In the back of my mind, I feel I could learn to love him like before.

I'm finally graduating from college. Our school had an open party, obviously he's my date. And not so surprisingly, we're not at d same table. Yes, we had one of our petty fights again. I decided to apologize (since it was actually my fault) just so i wouldn't ruin our night. We kissed and made up. We drank and drank with our friends and danced the whole night away. Hours later, I was feeling numb already so I went to the little girls room to freshen up. On my way back, I passed by the room which we call in our school as the "make-out room". And lucky old me, there's someone inside!! As curious as i was, I sneaked in to take a peek. I held my breathe as I moved closer and closer. The closer I get the louder I could hear the guy moaning with satisfaction. I moved the curtains to see who it was, then there they were! I totally froze, I was speechless. In awe and dismay, I ran as far away as I could. I can never ever forgive him for what he has done to me. I've sticked with him for 2 years and this is what I get?! Tell me how will I ever get over my boyfriend getting it on with another man??

Care to Chat?

As I was sparkin it up with xXxabsolute_charmerxXx (or sisid mode as they call it), a certain Malaki.Ang.Titik.O_1984 keeps buttin in our conversation. I turned my attention to him and asked his name/age/sex/location? To which he answered through a personal message or PM: If I tell you I have to fuck you. I was SHOCKED, MORTIFIED, and a li'l aroused I have to admit. But the demure innocent lady that I am (or atleast pretending to be), I replied: I'm sorry?. He gave me a smiley :) then logged out. Talk about Weirdo..who has made an impression. Normally I would have just moved on with the next guy but I don't know what is it about him that made me so curious and intrigued. The next day I saw him in the room flirting with Sheena4u. I felt jealous. I sent him a PM: Not if I fuck you first. So tell me. nasl? Indeed, that caught his attention. We exchange thoughts to absurd proportions, which are mostly not suited for the timid and meek. In short, puro kabastusan. He unleashed the hidden side of me and It felt great!

The next day we met at SM Megamall. I wasn't nervous coz I know I look good. Then I got gulat, someone softly pinched me from behind and whispered, "Ms. Pussycat?" to which I answered "Big Letter O?". I couldn't believe my eyes, he actually looks cute. No, he IS cute!! Honestly, I felt horny the whole day I was with him. I can't stop fantasizing. Secretly undressing him in my mind. After watching a movie, he took me to this nice resto-bar called Bed (which all the more turned me on). All this horniness is making me tired and hungry, I could really use the comfy sofa bed. Suddenly I was caught off-guard when he knelt down unzipped his pants then held my hair delicately, somewhat forcing me to take it in. I held his cOck gently kissing it from the tip gradually moving down until I was feeling his blood rushing upwards as it began to harden. I watched it as it stood tall, lean and mean. It..was..just..magnificent and abnormally HUGE. He held my hips then tossed me on my back. I had no chance to refuse. His hot soft lips touched mine, slowly moving downwards to my neck. He took my hands and held them tightly making it hard for me to stop him. He strokes his cOck adding more to my pleasure. Then rips my shirt exposing my big supple breasts. He fondled with my chest, kissing and rubbing it hard while he penetrates his Big Letter O into my Pussycat. Butterflies were rushing as I anticipate the feeling of having his big cock inside me. He held me closer as he thrust his big man business back and forth, increasing the speed and depth, back and forth again and again. It blew my effin brains off. I was in cloud 9. Then he utters:

Lookin' in your eyes. While you on the other side. And I think miss shorty I've got a thing for you. Doin' it on purpose windin And workin' it. I can tell by the way you lookin' at me girl.

I wanna make love in this club. Hey!

Eventually, I woke up and logged in.

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* "Same shit, different day (SSDD)" - Inday *

ENGLISH 101

1. I couldn't care a damn! (WHEW!)
2. What's your next class before this? (ANO DAW???!!!)
3. Nothing in this world is perfect except the word "change". (YEAH RIGHT?!)
4. Can you repeat that for the second time around once more from the top? (100000 TIMES)
5. My dad brought home a lot of hand-me-downs! (TRANSLATION: DAMING DALANG PASALUBONG NG TATAY KO..GALING NO?!)
6. Standard and Chartered Bank (SAN BA TALAGA KUYA?)
7. I'm very iterated!!! (TRANSLATION:GALIT SHA!..AT TALAGANG MAY KARAPATANG MAGALIT!)
8. I'm sorry, my boss just passed away. (TRANSLATION: KAKADAAN LANG NG BOSS KO. LOL!)
9. Hello, my boss is out of town. Would you like to wait? (E KUNG IKAW KAYA MAGHINTAY?!)
10. What happened after the erection of Mayon Volcano? (AY! AY ANO BA YUN???!!!AAAHHHHAAAHHAH!)
11. Don't touch me not! (HINDI NA NGA DIBA?!)
12. Hello?... For a while, please hang yourself... (PATAYIN KA BA?!)
13. Its spilled milk under the bridge. (OH,YES?!)
14. Don't change anything! Keep it at ease. (HA?!!! O CIGE NA NGA!!)
15. Hello McDo? Mag-i-inquire lang ako kung magkano ang kidney meal?(IPAKAIN BA ANG KIDNEY SA BATA)
16. You!!! You're not a boy anymore! You're a man anymore! (O YES, ANYMORE!)
17. Out of fit ako these days eh... (TRANSLATION: DI SYA NAKAKAPAGEXERCISE)
18. Come, lets join us! (OH COME ON?!)
19. Bring down the house down! (IBABA NATEN NG HUSTO!)
20. I'm the world champion of the World!!! (DI KA LANG CHAMPION..THE BEST KA PA?!)

Mga Seryosong Katanungan na may Seryosong Kasagutan.

1. Pwede bang uminom ng softdrink kapag coffee break?
Sagot 1: Pwedeng uminom ng softdrink kung coffebreak ngunit kailangan itong lagyan ng asukal at kopimeyt. Kopimeyt dapat at huwag gatas. (Milk in my cereal, kopimeyt in my pepsi. sounds good to me!)
Sagot 2: PWEDENG UMIINOM NAG-BREAK NGA ANG MGA COFFEE KAYA ALA SILA,KAYA PWEDE SOFTDRINKS AT HINDI MO NA KAILANGANG LAGYAN NG ASUKAL AT KOPIMEYT.
Sagot 3: Palagay ko di pwedeng uminom ng softdrink kapag coffee break. Bawal sa health natin. Di ba tinawag na softdrink ang softdrink dahil inumin ito na
malambot? Kapag malambot, lalambot din ang tuhod mo. Ang coffee ay nagpapanerbyos. Kung iinom ka nito bagsak ka sa lambot! Kaya no way, simply for health reasons!

2. Pwede bang gamitin ang a.m. radio pag gabi na?
Sagot 1: Maari lamang gamitin ang a.m. radio kapag umaga, kapag sa gabi ka makikinig, f.m. na ang tawag don.
Sagot 2: PWEDENG GAMITIN KAPAG GABI NA PERO, MGA KANTANG INGLES LAMANG ANG MARIRINIG MO DAHIL KAPAG GABI SA ATIN AY UMAGA SA U.S.
Sagot 3: DEPENDE. Kung sa umaga ka makikinig ng a.m. radio kailangan itago mo ang radio kay inday. Lalo na kapag naglalaba ito ng mga brief mo. Dahilan? Dahil tiyak, nakikinig ito ng Matud Nila na drama sa DZRH. Sa gabi naman ay ganoon din, Gabi ng Lagim at Simatar! Magkasunod ang dalawang ito kaya hindi lang si inday ang kakompitensiya mo sa a.m. radio mo kundi pati na rin si
dodong na hardinero niyo.

3. Ang fire exit ba ay labasan ng apoy?
Sagot 1: Ang fire exit ay ginagamit lamang bilang labasan ng apoy kapag may sunog. Ito ang kanilang daan upang sila'y makatakas o ang tinatawag na "fire escape."
Sagot 2: ANG FIRE EXIT AY HINDI LABASAN NG APOY DAHIL WALA NAMANG FIRE ENTRANCE NA PINASUKAN ANG APOY. YUNG MGA NA-FIRE SA TRABAHO DAHIL UMINOM NG SOFTDRINK NA MAY
ASUKAL SA COFFEE BREAK NILA ANG DUMADAAN DITO.
Sagot 3: Ka-bobohan! Ang FIRE ESCAPE ay hindi pintuan. Ito ay isang LUKSUHAN ng mga taong napaso sa init ng mga kape nila habang nagko-coffee break. Dahil nga sa napaso sila, hindi na sila naka-pasok sa office. Na-FIRE sila. Sa inis, nagtatatalon sila. Ayun! Nag-skip sila ng nag-skip! Bisaya lang kasi yung nagsasalita nun kaya FIRE ESCAPE!

4. Ang uod ba pag namatay ay inuuod din?
Sagot 1: Ang tao kapag namatay ay hindi tinatao. Malamang ang inuod ay hindi rin
inuuod. Kung ang tao ay inuuod kapag nalagutan ng hininga, siguro ang uod
kapag namatay ay tinatao.
Sagot 2: KUNG NAGPAKATAO ANG TAO NUNG NABUBUHAY SIYA,MALALAMANG TINATAO SIYA SA KANYANG LIBING AT MARAMING PUPUNTA. KUNG ANG UUD AY NAGING MABUTING UOD AT
NAGPAKAUOD, MALAMANG UURIN DIN SIYA. KAYA DEPENDE SA UOD SA UGALI NG UOD KUNG UUURIN SIYA.
Sagot 3: HINDI. Ang uod ay hindi na inaabutan ng kamatayan. Bago ito mamatay, nagging langaw na siya. Maaring mamatay ang langaw sa utos ni Mam na mag-spray ng basurahan o ng kumedor si inday at si dodong. O dili kaya ay dumikit sa fly-trap na sinabit sa may bintana. Naku, pwede ba galangin natin ang mga patay?!!

5. Totoo bang ang mga manok na pinatay sa jolibee ay masasaya kaya sila tinawag na chicken joy?
Sagot 1: Ang mga manok na pinatay sa Jolibee ay masaya kung kaya't sila'y tinawag na chicken joy. Ngunit hindi kinakailangang sa jolibee patayin ang manok upang ito ay maging masaya...ang mga manok ay nagiging masaya kapag sila ay may kasama sa buhay. kundi...mcchicken singles. (PS. Ang
pinakamasayang manok sa lahat ay iyong 6 pcs. chicken mcnuggets o yung nasa
bucket at ito'y tinatawag na "orgy" sa inggles)
Sagot 2: "MGA MANOK NI JOY", ANG IBIG SABIHIN NG CHICKEN JOY. NAGKAMALI LANG SILA NG SULAT NAPAGBALIKTAD LANG ANG CHICKEN AT ANG JOY. SI JOY ANG ANAK NG MAY ARI NG JOLIBEE
AT SA KANYA IPINAMAHALA ANG MGA MANOK. KAYA HINDI MAGANDANG IPALAGAY NA MASAYA ANG MGA CHICKEN, PERO PWEDE SIGURONG SABIHING MADALI, DAHIL CHICKEN LANG.
Sagot 3: Lubhang nakapagtataka naman na hindi ipagpalagay na hindi masasaya ang mga manok ni Joy kahit chicken lang ang pagpatay sa mga ito! Nakapag-party nga sila with Jolibee Mascot at may friend pa silang kasama ss mcdonalds. Ano kaya ang masasabi ni Max, ni Col Kentucky at ni Kenny tungkol dito? Isama pa pala dito si Andok na taga-Baliwag!

6. Kung ang 7-11 store ay bukas 24 hrs a day , 7 days a week , at 365 days a year. bakit may lock pa ang pinto nila? bakit ? bakit?
Sagot 1: Dalawa ang dahilan. Una, may coffee break (tingnan ang katanungan bilang 1 hinggil sa maaaring inumin kapag coffe break) din naman ang mga nagtatrabaho sa 7-11. Pangalawa, mayroon tayong tinatawag na leap year.
Sagot 2: HINDI TOTOONG 24HRS NA BUKAS ANG 7-11, BUKAS LAMANG TALAGA ITO NG 7-11. SINUBUKAN MO NA BANG MAG-STAY NG 24HRS SA 7-11? SINASARADO TALAGA ITO AT HINDI MO LANG NAPAPANSIN. KAYA KAILANGAN NG LOCK.
Sagot 3: Pinagtatalunan pa ba ninyo ang katanungang iyan? PALAGING SARADO ang pinto ng 7-11 store --- 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 12 months a year, 365 days a year. Una. May aircon sila. Lubhang maaksaya sa kuryente kapag laging bukas ang pinto nito. Pangalawa. Nasubukan na ba ninyong pumunta doon? Sino ang nagbubukas ng pinto para sa inyo? Di ba, Sikyo? Kung laging bukas ang 7-11, di na nila kailangan pa na magkaroon ng sikyo para pagbuksan ka ng pinto.

7. Bakit di mataas ang highway?
Sagot 1: Dahil kung mataas ang highway, walang paglalagyan ng skyway.
Sagot 2: MATAAS ANG H-WAY, AT KAHIT GAANO KATAAS ANG H-WAY HINDI NITO TATAMAAN ANG SKYWAY DAHIL NASA SKY NA ITO.
Sagot 3: mmmm. Di ko naisip ito ha?! Oo nga ano? Bakit nga ba.?

8. Ba't alang lumilipad na sasakyan sa flyover?
Sagot 1: Hindi lang natin nakikita ang mga nagliliparang sasakyan sapagkat hindi tayo tumitingala kapag tayo ay nasa flyover. Ang pagsalin ng dayuhang salita na flyover sa katutubong wika ay "fly"-lipad, "over"-sa ibabaw. Ibig sabihin nito na ang mga kotse ay hindi lumilipad sa flyover ngunit sa ibabaw ng flyover. Ngayon kung titingala ka naman kapag ikaw ay nasa flyover ang tangi mong makikita ay ang kisame ng iyong sasakyan. Alam kong wala sa inyong mayroong sasakyan na
Miata, Boxster, Kompressor, Z3, Z8 at kung ano-ano pang kotseng pangmayaman kaya't huwag na kayong magpumilit mamilosopo...ako lang ang may karapatan. Kung idadahilan niyo naman na mayroon kayong sunroof, hanapin ninyo ang inyong tinatawag na sense of humor". Namamatay ng maaga
ang palaging seryoso.......HEHEHEHE!
Sagot 2: HAY NAKUU! WALA NAMAN TALAGANG SASAKYANG LUMILIPAD
SA FLYOVER, MGA LANGAW LAMANG ANG UMOOVER DITO. KAPAG
UMOVER ANG SASAKYAN TIYAK, AKSIDENTE. KUNG SINO MAN
ANG GUMAWA NITO, HINDI SIYA NAKAKATAWA.
Sagot 3: Meron naman noh! Paminsan- minsan nga lang. At saka hindi naman talaga mga kotse at bus ang nagpa-fly-over kundi mga eroplano at helicopter. O kita mo na may langaw na naman. Sabi ko na sa inyo hindi na aabutan pa ng pagkamatay ang uod habang siya ay isa pan g uod. Namamatay na ito na isang Langaw!
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Ang lahat ay inaanyayahan na makipagpalitan ng kanilang mga kuro-kurot pala-palagay tungkol sa mga nabanggit na mga seryoso at napapanahong mga katanungan. Kinakailangan lamang na maging matalino ang inyong mga sagot at pinag-isipang mabuti. Matapos kang makipagtagisan ng opinion.. Wala lng, Salamat!

The problems with GUYS

If u TREAT him nicely, he says u are IN LOVE with him;
If u Don't, he says u are PROUD.
If u DRESS Nicely, he says u are trying to LURE him;
If u Don't, he says u are from KAMPUNG.
If u ARGUE with him, he says u are STUBBORN,
If u keep QUIET, he says u have no BRAINS.
If u are SMARTER than him, he'll lose FACE;
If he's Smarter than u, he is GREAT.
If u don't Love him, he tries to POSSESS u;
If u Love him, he will try to LEAVE u.(very true huh?)
If u don't make love with him., he says u don't Love him;
If u do!! he says u are CHEAP.
If u tell him your PROBLEM, he says u are TROUBLESOME;
If u don't, he says that u don't TRUST him.
If u SCOLD him, u are like a NANNY to him;
If he SCOLDS u, it is because he CARES for u.
If u BREAK your PROMISE, u Cannot be TRUSTED;
If he BREAKS his, he is FORCED to do so.
If u SMOKE, u are BAD girl;
If he SMOKES, he is a GENTLEMAN.
If u do WELL in your exams, he says it's LUCK;
If he does WELL, it's BRAINS.
If u HURT him, u are CRUEL;
If he HURTS u, u are too SENSITIVE!!


Haayy..anu b tlga..


SuMtYmS, cArInG iS bEtTeR dAn LoViNg CoZ wHeN u CaRe, uR sAfE fRoM LoSiNg D pErSoN u CaRe AbOuT. . . . . .BuT wEn U LuV, u CaN lOsE eVeRyThInG yOu'Ve FeArEd Of LoSinG fOrEvEr...

What Hurts the Most?

• letting go of a person u've just learned to love
• reminiscing the good times u shared together
• shielding ur heart to love somebody
• trying to hide what u really feel
• trying to hide the tears that involuntarily fall from ur eyes
• loving a person too much
• giving up someone u never thought of giving up
• having the right love at the wrong time
• taking the risk to fall in love again
• hiding ur relationship from someone else
• controlling ur feelings to avoid hurting a friend
• thinking of him every waking and sleeping moment knowing all the while that he never even thinks a single thought of you.
• letting go, because everytime you see the person, you only fall deeper ...
• holding back only to find out when it's too late, you both felt the same way, but were only scared to lose each other so much that you didn't let the feelings out
• falling in love with someone you didnt mean to fall in love with
• finding the perfect guy...with only one prob....he doesnt love you..
• helping the one you love court your friend
• seeing the one you love crying for someone else
• the waiting also hurts like hell
• having to hear "... I've met someone"
• asking his freedom back bcoz 'he'd be happier with her'
• asking u to 'forget that everything happened'and be 'normal' friends again
• hearing that u're treated as a lil sis
• sharing his future plans for the girl with you
• u stopped being friends bcoz his gf asked him to.
• being denied in front of people
• telling u lies where he'd been when actually, he was with a 'new friend' or an 'old flame'
• he told u he'd be leaving u to return to her ex (d one he left 4 u!)
• breaking someone's heart
• fighting for that one thing that would make you happy
• that is, holding on to a person who can not guarantee you him commitment unless he fix himself...then, you are left hanging for the moment...then he says, time will tell... but you still decided to hope in him and trust him (omg!)
• PRETENDING you're OK when inside you're dying..
• PRETENDING to be strong.... and RECOGNIZING your weakness
• lying in bed each night, thinking of that special person you can never have...
• being with someone you can't actually love...
• pretending you don't love a person whom you actually love...
• being in love...
• letting go even if you really don't want to...having no right to say you are hurting because it was your decision
• seeing the person you love hurt because of you...and not being able to help that person...
• having the courage to say I LOVE YOU to the person you love and finding out afterwards that things will never be the same again when he/she doesnt treat you with the same closeness as before
• having to face the fact that someone is capable of completely destroying the wall that you have set for yourself, leaving you weak and vulnerable
• admitting that you love someove despite his imperfections
• finding out that the more you try to hate him, the more you end up loving him, perhaps even more than before
• realizing how stupid your mistakes were that led to your break-up.
• the thought that this guy, used to really love you and you loved him as well but you didn't give enough and he gave up on you (omg!)
• Sharing the one you love with SOMEBODY else..
• making a promise....and realizing that when the time has come for that promise to be delivered....the commitment is no longer there...
• the hardest thing about love - believing it exists.

After you've been hurt......learn to forgive...learn to trust and love again. xoxo<3xoxo