How To: Pass Time

METHOD I: The Hard Way

What you need:
*Billboard
*Pen and Paper
*TV news crew
*Cellphone

Steps:
1. Find the highest billboard.
2. Climb it (but make sure you're still audible to the crowd below).
3. Find the perfect angle wherein you will look good on camera.
4. Start blaming your in-laws. (note: write down in advance the names of your boss, enemies, or anyone who's giving you a hard time so you can mention all of them also)
5. Once your finished you may now call your husband/wife so that they can "persuade" you to come back down. (note: only call your husband/wife if you're 101% sure that they don't want you to jump)

METHOD II: The Easy Way

What you need:
*Gun
*Knife
*Any sharp object (like your seatmates arse)

Steps:
1. Use the gun, knife or your seatmates arse to engage in coitus with yourself.